When a member delivers excellent results but destroys team morale, separate performance from behavior via a clear standard and a direct honest conversation.

When your emotion doesn't serve the situation, do the opposite of what it pushes you to.

Rank your fears from least to most anxiety-provoking, then face one each week.

Convert 5 resume bullets from "duties" to Situation-Task-Action-Result outcomes.

Replace vague "good job" with specific praise describing: what he did, impact, why it matters.

Instead of "I want to run a marathon", say "I'm a runner" — identity drives behavior.

Don't target "$100K this year" — target "3 sales calls daily".

Each month, write 3 behaviors to start, 3 to stop, 3 to continue.

Write four sentences: Describe the behavior, Express the impact, Specify the change, Consequences.

Memorize one 7-word refusal sentence and rehearse it until it emerges automatically under pressure.

In tough confrontation: Describe-Express-Specify-Consequence — four sentences resolve.

Trust is built by small promises kept — start with 3 this week.

When you hear a name, anchor it with 3: pronounce it + match a famous bearer + a face trait.

In direct Anglo cultures, talk 60%/listen 40%; in East-Asian, reverse it.

A 10-step ladder (from "smile at a passerby" to "deliver a speech") climbed weekly.

When a text exchange escalates, freeze the thread immediately and switch channels before the next reply.

End a drawn-out text thread with a warm closing line instead of silently fading out.

When talking across generations (a parent, a teen), switch to their preferred channel, not yours.

Prepare one line that works for any brief encounter under 20 seconds (elevator, hallway, queue).

Replace "what do you do?" with a question that opens a story, not a dry job title, at networking events.

Invest 90 passing seconds weekly with a neighbor using one follow-up question that builds cumulative rapport.

Use one "bridge" question to move dialogue from the surface (weather) to a real shared thread (values, ambition).

When a conversation drops into awkward silence, name it lightly instead of fleeing or pretending it didn't happen.

Don't assume your partner's love language — test it with three situations this week and compare reactions.

Keep 3 ready "repair" phrases to deploy mid-argument before it escalates into emotional flooding.

Identify 5 feelings that make you open phone. Per feeling, alternative plan pre-touch.