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20-Minute Time-Out in a Fight
When pulse passes 100, call a 20-min time-out — physiology needs time.
Goal
Prevent emotional flood via an announced ≥20-min time-out.
Steps
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1
Pre-agree: "If one says '20-min break', we stop without argument".
Expected Outcome
Immediate
No explosion. Dialogue resumes instead of being ended forever.
Evidence base
School: Gottman Method
Founders: John Gottman · Julie Gottman (1999)
Gottman — Flooding research: above 100 BPM the brain loses dialogic capacity.
Keywords
#conflict#نزاع#gottman#time-out#flooding#استراحة#social#somatic#desc#breath#استراحة الشجار#فيضان عاطفي#emotional-flooding#physiological-pause#agreed-signal#couples-conflict#heart-rate#de-escalation-tool#resuming-dialogue#self-soothing#استراحة معلنة في الشجار#اتفاق مسبق على التوقف#agreed-pause-signal#flooding-prevention#physiological-reset
Frequently asked questions
How long does "20-Minute Time-Out in a Fight" take?
This exercise takes about 25 minutes, practiced with another person in a Somatic format.
When will I notice the effect of "20-Minute Time-Out in a Fight"?
No explosion. Dialogue resumes instead of being ended forever. In the short term: Fights end with solutions not slammed doors.
Is "20-Minute Time-Out in a Fight" evidence-based?
Yes — it draws on Gottman Method (John Gottman, Julie Gottman (1999)). Gottman — Flooding research: above 100 BPM the brain loses dialogic capacity.
Is "20-Minute Time-Out in a Fight" suitable for beginners?
Its difficulty level is: Advanced. No external tools required — it can be practiced directly inside the app.
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